An annecdote of how the demon drink led me to ruin

[Bleakmoor]

It's my 3rd match with new DE team in FOL. A bit of slow start for them as it's been difficult to get time Still it's a bank Holiday and I have time

It's been a long day and i resolve to give them a run out. I'm spinning for less than a minute before i get matched against Lizzies at around 1000TV . Woho! Something other than DwOrcs is always a welcome change...

Anyway I take the Kick...and It goes well for the first half...The Lizzie coach is good and presses hard but the dice go my way and i've nicked the ball and score on turn 6. Then I hold for 2 turns. So now I'm winning 1-0 at half time. This is looking good I think to myself - one thing I can do is defence with DE.

So i think I'll crack open a cold beer.

I open one, pour it in the cold frosty glass. and take a gentle sip as I recieve for the 2nd half.
Nice. Cold. Beer. Long. Hot. Day. & 1-0 up. Ahh. This is a great bank holiday...

Turn 3. Oh, but hold on . Beer glass is empty. . hmm..Still driving to End Zone. Pesky Skinks. Stunties getting through my screen.

I'll just go get a refill.

Oh, crap 1minute left to move. move everyone. eek !! clicked wrong player to Blitz...er.. didn't mean to do that..and my Blister..I mean Blitzer is out of position. Nevermind it's ok. I'll score next turn. no problem. I'll just have another sip of the cold stuff in the meantime...help me relax and foxus, i mean focus.....

...Oh, Crap ! Missed that Saurus! How did i Miss a Saurus FFS! It's the size of Bus! A big green HORNED BUS! But I've left him unmarked. Here comes the Blitz. damn ! balls loose ! Great ! Now I have to crack the cake..er.. I mean cage. I mean..hmm. I'm a bit peckish..i'll get some crips..er..crisps.. Oh, if i'm in the kitchen i may as well get a refill...

ah, more crap. his cage is moving fat.I mean.fast.

Get everyone back !!! 2 guys near the endzone.don't need two up there! get him in the action....END TURN !!???WTF! END TURN !! what a stupid place to put the damn END TURN button !! I Don't remembner it being that large before...Damnit! i'll just down this last bit of beer ansh try to fokus more... My Turn. bugger Bltiz the ball carrier with A lineman. Ah ! er..? how many dice is it? shouldn;t that be 3? i'm sure i'm covering...oh bugr...oh nevermind. Jut roll. do it. A Pow and a pushhh! I go to click pow.! eh..?? I clicked push!!What is wrong wif the feckin mouse..!! somehting wrong with my mouse it's not clicking proberbly. proberly. keyboars in fecked too. Odd. Screen res.ish a bit blurry now..

Bah. 1-1. Well played lizziie coahc. What? takin a while to move? me ? really? oh, srry. It's a difficut game. Tough. and good catching, i mean coaghing. coaching. still two turns left still ? anything can happen. OK. I'll juss set up back here. Oh looks you got bitzed. I mean Blitz!. Skinsk closin on runner. I'll run and chuck it far far away for the SPPP . oops a frail doggy ..i mean a failed dodgy. Turnover. No RR.Where my RR go? Can't remember.

Skinks picks it up . Runs it in . Turn 16. i loose 2-1.
I try typing gg. but manage to shout ggrrgg!! at my opponent.

fall of my chair. hit head on desk. Wife puts me to bed.

The moral of the story?

Don't drink and drive. :

[Colonel Panic]

2 beers leaves you falling out of your chair and ignoring Skinks?

Drinking isn't your problem. Not drinking enough is your problem!!

[Darkson]

2 beers and you lose the ability to play Blood Bowl? I want to play you at a tabletop tournament!

[kabooki]

Maybe those are the only ones he/she remembers. Blood Bowl is a rather involved game and perhaps there were more alcoholic drinks consumed. Perhaps he/she didn't eat anything all day before drinking.

Really, I feel the whole thing is just a joke to an eventual punchline.

[Colonel Panic]

if so, I enjoyed the whole post and was trying not to laugh out loud at work

If this forum had a "like" button, I'd "Like"

[Bleakmoor]

2 beers leaves you falling out of your chair and ignoring Skinks?

Drinking isn't your problem. Not drinking enough is your problem!!

Couldn't agree more
in fact as it was a bank holiday weekend so the BBQ had been on all day and i'd been drinking since lunch time...
but as they say, it's always the last one that gets you...

Maybe those are the only ones he/she remembers. Blood Bowl is a rather involved game and perhaps there were more alcoholic drinks consumed. Perhaps he/she didn't eat anything all day before drinking.

Really, I feel the whole thing is just a joke to an eventual punchline.

True - although the game did take place I took a little" artistic licence", but it was the silliest game I've ever played...and looking back it made me chuckle so I thought i'd share my embarrassment - I wish I could upload the re-play but no idea how/where etc.

still, lesson learned - I play (mostly) sober(ish) now.

[hermanJnr.]

Maybe those are the only ones he/she remembers. Blood Bowl is a rather involved game and perhaps there were more alcoholic drinks consumed. Perhaps he/she didn't eat anything all day before drinking.

This is true.

The last time I consumed alcohol without eating first I had a meagre 3 pints. This inexplicably lead to having a very intense (and deeply incoherent) whispered discussion with a girl about nicotine, followed by clumsy kissing

Given how fun that evening was, the tale of ineptitude in the OP and my own failure as a BB coach, I think I may try playing inebriated soon. There's actually a chance it will improve my tactical competence.

[brynjar]

I've had 2-3 beers the last couple of hours. Still planted firmly on my chair though. Bloodbowl is even running in the background as i type this. I must be some kind of superhuman

[Darkson]

I must be some kind of superhuman

A thread-nercomancer at least.